Re:Zero – Starting Life in Another World. Volume. 1.
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‘CHAPTER 4:- FOURTH TIME’S THE CHARM.’
‘Sub-Chapter 2.’
“I guess I’ll call it ‘Return by Death’… The fact that it’s a power that assumes you’re going to lose really makes it fitting for me, doesn’t it?”
It was a power that activated once the user had lost their life. If the heroic thing was to come back from the brink of death and win the day, then getting a chance to do things over after you’ve lost felt more like something a cheat would do.
“More seriously, though…would you call this sort of thing time travel?”
A loop phenomenon that only activated under certain conditions. If you were to think of it as a game, you could say it was like Subaru was being brought back to an auto-save point, one he had no control over, whenever he died.
“So a loop or a time slip, huh… I mean, I’m used to this sort of thing happening in manga, but I saw somewhere that realistically it was really hard to explain time travel to the past…like, that it would be easier to remake the world from scratch rather than slip back in time.”
With what Subaru knew from the Internet, where knowledge was vast but shallow, going back in time was about as unrealistic as you could get. However, given that he had already been summoned to another world, he wasn’t really in a position to be debating degrees of unrealism.
“But if you consider that this Return by Death thing is really happening, then everything so far starts to make sense.”
Looking back, Subaru had already died three times in this world.
The first time was when he and Satella had visited the loot cellar together. The second time was when he, Rom, and Felt had all been cut down by Elsa’s blade. Then the third time, which to Subaru just felt like it happened a few minutes ago, he’d died a dog’s death.
Unlike the first and second times, the third death was the worst, and he couldn’t make any excuses about it. He didn’t think that he could mess up so badly as to be killed by weak mob characters while he was still in the prologue.
“Still, dying three times in only half a day is just way too high of a rate.”
Given that normally people only had one life to live, dying three times in half a day was just absurd.
Sure, Subaru had lived the previous seventeen years of his life peacefully, but depending on how you looked at it, if you multiplied 17 years by 365 days, and three resets, Subaru had lived through quite a few days on which he could have died.
“Or…if you looked at it another way, I just suck at living.”
The difference between the difficulties of staying alive in his previous world and this one was far too great. There were tons of places here that threatened Subaru’s life. There were dangerous places wherever he turned.
“Given the similarities between the first and second time…Elsa was probably the culprit the first time as well.”
The first time, the one who was hiding in the shadows of the loot cellar was probably Elsa. The giant corpse was Rom, and he and Satella had arrived after Felt and Elsa had had their negotiations.
“I can’t be sure, but Felt probably asked for too much, and after negotiations broke down…that’s what happened.”
After Elsa had finished making sure no one was left alive to tell what happened, Subaru and Satella had been unlucky enough to walk right in.
“The second time is simple. I was already with Rom and Felt when negotiations broke down… To be killed twice by the same person… Is Elsa the kind of character that when you run into them it means certain death?”
Subaru tried to pass the idea off as a joke so that he could lie to himself about how scared he was of her.
It was obviously foolish to even think of any options he might have if he ran into her.
The only place where Subaru had a chance of encountering Elsa was the loot cellar, and the only reason that Subaru needed to go to the loot cellar was to take back Satella’s stolen badge, and the reason he wanted to take back Satella’s stolen badge was because he wanted to return the favor to Satella for saving him.
However, because Return by Death had sent him back in time, his duty to return the favor to Satella was left behind in the world of his first run-through.
When Subaru met Satella on his third run-through, her cold reaction to him was proof of that.
Satella didn’t know Subaru anymore. The favor that he was supposed to return got lost along the way as he was reset.
If so, it would be best for Subaru to forget about Satella and focus on avoiding the threat of Elsa.
Subaru didn’t know why had been thrown into this Return by Death scenario, but because of it, he was fortunate enough to know the future. He knew what mines to avoid. Avoiding them was the right thing to do.
“Well, it’s about time I got moving. Fortunately, I know that I can turn my cell phone into cash, so I’ll just amass some funds, and live a good life using my modern knowledge. It’ll be full of dreams! Don’t you think, old man?”
“Just when I thought you were muttering some nonsense to yourself, you’re asking my opinion? I don’t know what you’re talking about, and I don’t care.”
As Subaru looked back to the man in the shop from before, seeking affirmation, the man gave his retort with an annoyed look on his face.
With that cold response of his Subaru felt a little hurt inside. No matter what world you’re in, the way people interact with strangers isn’t all that different.
“But you see, there are some people out there who, even if it puts them in a tight spot, can’t help but help other people out.”
Even after something precious had been stolen from her, and even as she was in the middle of chasing after the person who’d stolen it, Satella had helped a completely and utterly useless stranger, took the time to heal his wounds, and tried to walk off without accepting any thanks.
She accepted that useless person’s selfishness and for her trouble met a horrible end.
“When you do the same thing three times, there are a couple of things that you begin to understand. Well, more like after three times you’d have to be incredibly stupid not to understand those things. I may be a little stupid, but not that stupid.”
“Just what nonsense are you talking about?”
“There’s probably a pattern here. Some kind of inevitability. No matter how many times you do something over, at least a few things will never change. Or at least there’s some sort of strong force that tries to keep things that way. For example…”
All three times, Satella had her badge stolen by Felt. The first and second times, Elsa caused a bloodbath. Even the third time around, it had probably happened as well, unrelated to Subaru’s death.
“I don’t know if I can win against Elsa. I still don’t know. But there is one thing I do know.”
If on the fourth time around Subaru didn’t do something, Felt and Rom would be killed by Elsa. It was also unavoidable for Elsa and Satella to fight as well.
So what if those two died? Subaru thought. One’s a bit of a villain who deals in stolen goods, and the other one is a bold girl who tries to overcharge for those stolen goods without any sense of shame or regret.
Both of them were criminals, so wouldn’t it be better off if they were gone? But still…
“Well…I guess I really am a product of the modern age. Even though I always used to make fun of people like this when I sat in front of a computer screen…”
Subaru used to act as if he thought pity and compassion were stupid. It wasn’t that he thought of it as an act, however. He just thought of himself as someone who didn’t really care all that much. That way, no matter what situation he found himself in, he was able to keep himself from getting too emotional about it. It didn’t matter to him if a few people he knew died. At least, that’s how he used to think.
“But you know, I hate it. It feels terrible. I know those two are far from being saints, but knowing that someone you know is going to be killed…that’s just impossible to ignore.”
In the past, when he acted uncaring, it really must have been nothing more than an act. It was the product of his interactions happening in a virtual world. Now that he had to deal with these heavy issues in real life, there was a whole different level of weight to them. But at the same time, Subaru thought he was shallow for changing one of his core beliefs about life, just as soon as things got hard.
“And of course there’s also Satella—I mean, that girl. I just can’t just abandon her like that.”
After calling her by that name and seeing her reaction, Subaru realized that “Satella” was a fake name. When he thought back to the first time around, she didn’t seem to be too fond of being called by that name. Then with the third time, it was painfully clear.
In other words, that meant that she didn’t trust him enough when she’d told him that name. Subaru hadn’t built up enough relationship points with her, so at one of the scenario forks he failed the test for getting her real name.
“In that case, I guess I’ll just have to work hard enough for her to actually give me her real name this time.”
Subaru stretched and twisted his body around, popping several joints as he got himself pumped up. The storeowner looked on at Subaru’s strange actions with a surprised look on his face.
Subaru, in response, suddenly lifted up his hand and said, “There’s just some times where a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do! Right, old man?”
“Yeah, yeah. That’s exactly the way it is. Totally agree. So go on and get outta here.”
Subaru thought that he had struck a good pose and said that line pretty well, but given the storeowner’s terribly monotonic reaction, he could feel his face starting to twitch.
Once the annoyed storeowner finally pushed him out of the store, he hurried along. After running about two hundred meters down the crowded street, he stopped and stood for a moment.
“Now, then…” Subaru lifted up his short bangs with his hand and then in exaggerated motions looked this way and that. Then he put his hand out to a nearby wall and leaned against it.
“Where do I need to go if I want to meet Not-Satella…?” he said. It wasn’t a phrase that inspired confidence about his actions, but he wasn’t going to just sit around and wait.
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